my getaway

xvaleriee:

ntnboy85:

hmm, does anybody but valerie reads these blogs of mine?  does valerie even read them?

if you decide to read this valerie, please read the whole thing.
if not, please don’t read it at all…

i feel so drained and tired.  i want to try, yet another part of me says it’s useless.  every single time i try i fail again and again.  i want to stand, but it seems i can’t…
it’s funny, a little baby could stand up every single time it falls.  us adults can’t do the same, we give up too easily.  but i suppose we also realize that some things are impossible to accomplish no matter how hard we try……

is this impossible to me?  i don’t know.  though it does seem like so.

so the other day, my sister asked, “did you know HE has a wife and kid?!”
and my mom & grandma said “stupid, of course he does, he’s old.”

and inside, i laughed.  some people said there is somebody for everybody.  well, i guess that might be true, but i don’t think everybody can find that somebody…… i’m sure there’s somebody out there who had never experienced “love”.  oh how afraid i am to be one of them…

so are you reading this valerie?….. did you know i liked you?  gross isn’t it?  haha.  an old fart like me……..  you don’t have to worry about tat anymore though!…. i know it wouldn’t work out anyways.  =P
but in ur opinion, should i have told you before, or stay quiet like i did, until i got over you?

people said i should just let out my feelings.  people said i should try, cuz “you’ll never know.”  i’m sure i asked you that before, about what i should do.  and u said i should try.  though, i didn’t listen, i gave up on you.  am i wrong not to listen to ur opinion, should i have tried?  i would like to know.

there’s this girl i know.  i’ve known her for about 5 years… wat can i say, i’m afraid.  i’ve failed once too many times.  i don’t know where to start.  part of me just wants to give up before i even started.  not sure if she’s interested… doesn’t seem like it…..

hehe, yeah….. i’m asking for ur advice/opinion.  you may be young, but i think u’r answers could help me out.

if you did read this and want to reply, EMAIL me at ntnboy85@yahoo.com.
i would greatly appreciate it.

thanx val.

ur friend,
-ntn

ps: sorry if this puts you in an awkward position…

hello thereee, uh . so i’m pretty shocked, but i kinda new it happened. i saw your feelings show when we started to get to know each other a bit more. to tell the truth, of course i saw you like an older brother. nothing really more, & i’m sorrry /: if i was such’a let down for you and had you going through a hard time. in my opinion, i think you should have not exactly told me right away, [ or when you like someone ] but give it some time. most of the time, if you think about it, time won’t tell. so for that, you gotta make your own decisions too. most of the time, it’s best to face your fears. even tho there’s a 50/50 chance of good & bad, you’re gonna be in a big relief afterwards. i’ve learned from most things that the more you hold things it, the bigger your stress will grow.

sooo this girl, you known her for 5 years eh? that’s a really long time, hmmm. i think when everything in your life is clear, ( like when school’s out of the way, and family ; stress free? ) but that — face it to her. try not to tell her RIGHTAWAY, like i like you. AHAH, that’s just awkward & creeepy. maybe lead her into the converstation, as if anyone special is part of her life & i gueess that’ll keep the convo flowing. if she tries to change the subject, she’s probably not in the mood to talk about it or just not interested yet to talk ‘bout that . wait, that sounded the same, but you got the point.

i hope i helped a bit, i have NO IDEA where i learn all this from! WOW valerie :P i wish you the best n, gooodluck. MY FEET HURT ):

don’t worry about it.  i have a pretty good intuition.  i wouldn’t say i was let down.  you still make me smile a lot.  =P  and yes, time doesn’t really tell…. haha.  ok, it will if the other person makes a move, but yeah…lol.

yeah, we’ve been just classmates. (she graduated already).
you see, i want one before i get a job and all.  the reason is, i don’t want a girl to follow me just because i can make money, or because they know i can be successful.  a lot of adults just think tat way.  they follow people who they think are successful.  and i think it’s wrong.  tat’s not true love.
highschoolers love each other just because they enjoy the presences of the other person.  tat’s how i think love should be.  they don’t think about money or what the other person is capable of becoming.  they love just because.

anyhow, thanx for the advice.  =)

hmm, does anybody but valerie reads these blogs of mine?  does valerie even read them?

if you decide to read this valerie, please read the whole thing.
if not, please don’t read it at all…

i feel so drained and tired.  i want to try, yet another part of me says it’s useless.  every single time i try i fail again and again.  i want to stand, but it seems i can’t…
it’s funny, a little baby could stand up every single time it falls.  us adults can’t do the same, we give up too easily.  but i suppose we also realize that some things are impossible to accomplish no matter how hard we try……

is this impossible to me?  i don’t know.  though it does seem like so.

so the other day, my sister asked, “did you know HE has a wife and kid?!”
and my mom & grandma said “stupid, of course he does, he’s old.”

and inside, i laughed.  some people said there is somebody for everybody.  well, i guess that might be true, but i don’t think everybody can find that somebody…… i’m sure there’s somebody out there who had never experienced “love”.  oh how afraid i am to be one of them…

so are you reading this valerie?….. did you know i liked you?  gross isn’t it?  haha.  an old fart like me……..  you don’t have to worry about tat anymore though!…. i know it wouldn’t work out anyways.  =P
but in ur opinion, should i have told you before, or stay quiet like i did, until i got over you?

people said i should just let out my feelings.  people said i should try, cuz “you’ll never know.”  i’m sure i asked you that before, about what i should do.  and u said i should try.  though, i didn’t listen, i gave up on you.  am i wrong not to listen to ur opinion, should i have tried?  i would like to know.

there’s this girl i know.  i’ve known her for about 5 years… wat can i say, i’m afraid.  i’ve failed once too many times.  i don’t know where to start.  part of me just wants to give up before i even started.  not sure if she’s interested… doesn’t seem like it…..

hehe, yeah….. i’m asking for ur advice/opinion.  you may be young, but i think u’r answers could help me out.

if you did read this and want to reply, EMAIL me at ntnboy85@yahoo.com.
i would greatly appreciate it.

thanx val.

ur friend,
-ntn

ps: sorry if this puts you in an awkward position…

If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with.

- MJ

highlights of the day….

-so in my photo class, i put on one of those UMBRELLAS for the FLASH STROBE LIGHT.  i swear it was on tight.  but when i look back, it slid down.  the umbrella touched the light, and the light burnt a hole in the umbrella.  =\  i felt so bad….

-i got pulled-over today.  my 3rd time ever. the main reason was because he said my car wasn’t registered.  he asked for the my license and registration.  he said the copy i have is up to date, so he guess his computer is not updated.  he also said i was driving close to 60mph on Capital Exp (which is 45 speed-limit).  and i said “REALLY?!”  cuz i was very very sure i was driving about 50mph (at least tat’s wat it said on my speedometer).  so yes, i was speeding a bit, but not near 60mph.  and he said i was changing lanes too much, and it’s dangerous.  BUT he said i’m cautious and turn on my signals and stuff.  in the end, he let me off.  =P

there are so much to a person to learn.  when i thought i knew them, i then realized i don’t know them at all.

xvaleriee:

ohmygoosh, i love his hair (;

ntn: haha, the heck is this val?

today’s quite a bz day, but quite a nice day.


first i woke up and went to the morning mass @ St Patrick.  mass was like usual, nothing to mention.

today was the first day of the new semester @ VAN LANG (viet school).  first day is always bz.  i saw my old student and let her skip a grade.  i originally have 29 kids this semester.  now i have 35 kids….. i thought i was lucky when i thought i only had 29……
today, i reviewed stuff for my students, went over school/classroom rules, and gave them a lil quiz just so i can see where they’re at.

OH!  i get 2 new teachers this semester.  =P  so i guess i’ll need to train them also.


after school, i went to teach piano.  i was 25 mins late cuz i had to do something for my teacher.  but yeah…. the piano kids did alright today.  just alright.  well, the first girl didn’t do too well.  she basically forgot all her old songs.  i’m reviewing the whole book again for her.
the second girl is doing alright.  she’s approaching the end of book 1.

after teaching those 2 kids, i went home, ate, rested, took a nap, and then went to St Patrick’s.  today is FLOCK’s and YouthMass’ Anniversary.  hurray!  we have quite a bit of people who came back and sang with us today.  i thought we sounded great today.  Cha Doan came to preside at our mass along-side with Cha Truyen and Cha Quang Minh.
the only bummer was tat it rained, so we had our potluck at the entrance of the church, and not outside.

after mass, drove judy home, and went to taco bell to chill with kevin.  it’s been a while.  standing outside talking while listening to the rain is nice.  hehe, my music teacher wished for the rain.  she’s prob satisfied now.  haha.

well, i suppose tat’s it.  i just finished grading my vietnamese kids’ quizzes.  the average is alright i suppose.  they need lots of work though.  and for some reason, i see quite a bit of girls with bad handwritten.  not to be sexes, stereotypical or anything, but yeah….just a bit surprise.  oh! and my kids this year are like 4th graders.  i’m actually quite satisfied.  middle-schoolers are quite a pain.

anyhow, i’m out.  late.

the setting takes place in my current room.  so i just woke up and was laying on my couch as i always am. when i open my eyes, there was my lil brother, Vi, Cuong and my room-mate.  yes, i have a room-mate and my brother apparently isn’t sharing the room with me.
ok, so here’s the weird part.  my room-mate is a girl!  yeah, i dunno where my lil bro sleeps, but it seems like this girl has been my room-mate for a long time.  the room setting is the same as it is now.  she sleeps on the bed on the other side of the room (where my brother sleeps now).  her name is Kim.  she was wearing a black tshirt, and i think bball shorts.  she have a pony-tail  she’s not too skinny, but fit.  she’s around my height.
so, Cuong, Son and Vi were talking to me about Kim, while Kim was in the restroom.  i think they were asking like “wassup with you and her?”.  and i’m like “huh? oh, i never really thought about it.”

it’s like, she’s been my room-mate for quite some time, yet i never really paid attention to her.  nor thought about anything.  it seems like i don’t even know anything about her, nor do i even talk to her.  we’re like in our own worlds even though we share the same room……….
so then she got out of the restroom, and went to her bed to grab something before she leaves, and i think i then asked her “wassup?”

then i woke up…..

man, i’m so tired……… i’m glad i didn’t have to teach piano today.

so today’s Friday…. i had my Product Photography class.  class starts at 9am and ends at 3:20pm.  yeah, tat really drained me.  not only tat, but i haven’t had much sleep the past few days.  anyhow, in class, the teacher showed us the different equipments.  quite cool.  we got to test it out.  i also get to try the school’s digital cameras; the Canon 5D w/ bevel(?).

anyhow, after class, i went home, used the comp.  i don’t even know why i didn’t take a nap.  i think it’s cuz i was talking to my friends………..

before i knew it, it was time to go to mass @ Trung Tam.  today, Cha De presided with 2 other priests.  Karen, Cindy and Domo weren’t here today.  probably on vacation for the long weekend.  but dylan was there.

after tat, went home, and went to Chau’s bday party.  met some new people whom i didn’t really talk to.  good thing Thuy was there.  Thai food was nice.  we finished pretty much all of our food.  =)
after the dinner, the others went bowling.  i went home.  i was a bit tired, and i don’t have my bowling shoes with me.

so, home…..  got home, and have been using the comp.  i’m kinda organizing my laptop and external hardrive.  transferring stuff and delete multiple duplicates.

yup.  tat’s about it.  i’m kinda tired though…. meh.  ok, late.
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randomness:
-oh the beauty of conveniency…..  haha, i’m so fucken lazy…=P

xvaleriee:

today was fun fun fun. i guesss, my life’s getting better or it’s just getting right. i came to school with my bangs down, and most people didn’t really notice me. got measured & weighed in 1st period; 5’4 & 90 pounds. wow, valerie, wow (x 2nd period; actually paid attention and shittt , & today was alright in her class. then break, mmm coookies. 3th; funny , i guess. ‘cause som put a pencil next to my face and goes, ” VALERIE VALERIE VALERIE ! ” and i turned my head quickly and go, ” WHAT?! ” and there goes a black mark on my face. earlier, before i was like ” wow som, who would turn their head like that, stuuupid. ” lmao, me. 4th - same ol’ things. 5th; boring, 6th; eh eh. new girl in our class, and i could tell PLAAAYA jose calls dibs. afterrr school, talked to sammy and stuff, about stuff. & raelyssa, i’m scared for susan /: she’s gonna get her feelings hurt. -__- ” after school all stars was alright, more piccctures with my allstars family. then SOCCCERPRACTICE, woot woot. my ” family ” is all playing soccer, we had like two minutes to change wow. then when to run 2 laps, warm ups, stretches , then played a game. it was funnnn, haven’t played a sport in awhile. after, we went to change, HEELLLA HOT AND SWEATING. yucccky . lalaa, after went home. actually got along with dad & brother. went to jamba juuuice, and stuffs . went home & ate, got ready for choir practice. the main point of choir practice today,

” if i was a fly, i’d fly around you ‘cause YOU’RE THE SHIT. ” - raaandy! LOLOL, i hella cracked up to that, the best pick up line EVER. Hmm, then came home and i asked for my laptop back from my dad and he gave it to me. i went to the restroom, changed, then came out with my fone in my hand. i went to my room , placed down my fone, and pop my head out my door and yelled, ” HA ! ” to my dad. i look back, and my fone disappeared. no one took it, it’s just gone. KARMA! lol, like really i have no idea where it it. i searched and all i found was this old cardigan, my chapstick, and that’s it. i tried calling it but it’s on vibrate. stupidddd valerie (x that’s it for now, byeeee ! (=

ntn:  that’s a hella GOOD pick-up line! lol

-hope my friend is really doing alright.

-humans are so cruel it disgusts me sometime.  we’re also so wasteful….i know it’s part of being human, but eh…

-i feel sorry for animals.  how humans are so cruel to them.  how boring their lives are.  they mainly just eat and sleep, and maybe if allowed, then they run around.  many are kept outside, even in the rain.  some owners leave water outside for them, and dirty shit just gets in there…..people need to take care of their PETS!  u’r cruel for taking them in and not taking good care of them!  just don’t own them then…..
meh….  and some people let their pet wander around and then it gets run over by a car. wtf.  and then you go get another pet.  stupid!

so today’s the first of September.  i suppose the day was alright…..

today i only had one class.  so i got to class just on time.  when i got in class, the teacher said, “turn in you writing assignment.”  and i’m like “writing assignment?!  we had one?!”……… well, apparently so cuz others turned it in….
well, the teacher gave us an extension, but she’ll deduct some points off.  meh, watever…..

so in class, we were working on our project.  and then i’m like….. “wait…. were were suppose to use both human made objects and organic objects?”  and well, we were suppose to use 3 organic and 1 man-made.  i used ALL organic….. FAIL again!  hope it’s ok though……….. man, i’m so bad with following directions….
it’s like the other day (same class).  we had to talk about our work.  well, we were to write down our “qualities” and make a mask resembling those “qualities”.  well, since i suck at following directions…… i just made a mask that looked cool….
well, the class was splitted into 2 groups.  when i had to talk about my work, the teacher was listening to the other group.  so i told my group “yeah…. i didn’t know we suppose to follow those qualities…. so i’ll just bs this.”  haha.  so i did.  i just bs and try to incorporate the mask somehow with the qualities.  =P

anyhow…….. after class i went home.  chilled for a bit, ate, and then my older sister decided to clean the house, and made me join her………  we got quite a bit done.  though, it’s nothing compare to the mess we have.  our house just have too much junk and not enuff space to store them all……..

well, later it was time for mass @ Trung Tam.  nothing special though.

after tat, went home, had dinner, then clean up the house some more.  we stopped around 11pm or so, then i just used the comp…………  quite tired i am….. shall i read, or sleep?……….hmm……. i feel lazy.  hahaha.

ok, i guess tat’s all, i’m out.  late.

so today’s monday.  it’s alright i suppose.

well, class started at noon, so i got quite a bit of sleep.  =)
“history of photography” wasn’t too bad.  i think the teacher is goin at a decent pace, and i understand him and i’m able to jot down notes on paper fast enuff.  he doesn’t really want us to use laptops (even though i type faster than i write…..)

anyhow, after tat class, i went to Concert Choir.  it was fun.  we went over all the music, and i didn’t feel lost.  well, at times i did, but i caught on.  =)

after class, i went home, ate, and then went to teach piano.  thank god the kid was home.  so i taught her.  i’m reviewing EVERYTHING.  from the basic notes, from basic counting.  i think i should buy a notespeller book for her too……

anyhow, after tat, i had to go buy some piano book.  and so yeah, i didn’t make it home in time for mass at Trung Tam.  o well….. though, now i’m goin to Trung Tam less cuz of piano lessons…..

so i got home, used the comp, had dinner, finished hw, played videogames, and now talking to my closest friend from SJSU.  she just kinda got back from Japan.  (jealous!!!)

anyhow, i have a headache now.  and i have to wake up early tomorrow.  i shall sleep.  late.

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-life is what you make of it.